Bitching Chef

The irritating question I always get!

Yes, I do love my job. It's just that I hesitate to tell people what it is that I do for a living; the minute I do I am unavoidably asked “the question.” The question makes me silently jump. It has no answer, yet if I had a quarter for every time someone asked it, I wouldn't have to work anymore. Perhaps I'm being unfair, without hesitation, I know that many professions suffer the redundancy of often asked unanswerable questions. Even so, I truly feel that the most exasperating question in the world remains:

"So, what's your favorite thing to cook?"

I can hear it coming before someone even asks me. I am not sure if I am asked this for lack of a better question, even so, the issue gives me a dislike grimace, every time. Having been requested my favorite thing to make more often than I can count, I should probably have come up with an answer by now. I can't.

However, it still leaves me with a mouthful of "oh, Ahau, ah·" and a false smile.

It is a ridiculous question, it has no answer. I cook and teach about food for a living, ten hours a day, fifty-two weeks a year. I cook Italian, French, Moroccan, Spanish, Chinese, Austrian, and Mexican food. I even try to cook American food. I use fruits, vegetables, shellfish, seafood, poultry, beef, pork, and everything in-between. I can't tell you what my favorite thing to make is because I don't have one. I make it all, and; on my day off, no matter what, I don't make a thing!

People in the restaurant/Hotel industry (myself included) have the most irregular and undeveloped eating habits of any I've ever met. My refrigerator is sparse and contains a few items. A piece of cheese, a jar of mustard, some hot sauce. If I'm lucky, I have milk and some bread that's not stale. This generally holds true for most of the people I know. Breakfast is slept through, lunch is coffee, and dinner is, for the most part, nonexistent, or spread out through unpredictable takes of what I happen to be using at work. This general pattern is continued through the workweek until I get a day off, upon which I lack both the wish and the essential ingredients to cook for myself. Married? Yes, and my partner face the same situation….... She is a cook.

I'd like to be honest. I'd like to tell people that their question is insipid and silly, that it's been asked hundreds of times. I don't. I suppose because another part of my job is being nice to people, considering it's classified under the 'hospitality' industry. Therefore, I hesitate to think that people will ever stop asking me the most annoying question in the world. However, I think I have come up with an answer.

The next time someone asks "so what's your favorite thing to make?"

I'll be ready - my favorite thing is to eat other’s people food.